Today is one of those days, and I am going to take this therapeutic moment right now and write it out, then hopefully hit publish so I can possibly get some feedback or ideas if I'm not too embarrassed.
On this overcast Friday, we all have the hint of dark blue on the inner corners of our eyes, accompanied by blank stares. We are all exhausted from lack of sleep.
Thanks to Mont.
When I sleep trained him back in October, he started sleeping solidly through the night. We were all so thrilled. Next up was toilet training. He succeeded at that too. And since November has been successfully toilet trained.
However.
Sleep has gone out the window since then. I've been in denial to the degree of not admitting it here. He wakes up at least 4/5 times a night just to go to the bathroom, stripping down to his birthday suit, then needing us to help him put his pajamas on again, or remind him to flush the toilet and wash his hands. We would tell him to hold it, except each time he goes like a racehorse.
I've lost my temper more than I'd care to admit today, and have even tried putting myself in timeout, which still sent Mont into a tail spin of tears, leaving me wanting to bang my head into my headboard over and over again. ha! Seriously.
Lds.org has been visited as I read through a few talks on anger, feeling bad that I'm not more patient. I found one quote that I had to write down for my fridge:
"Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry; for anger resteth in the bosom of fools." (Ecclesiastes 7:9) Nice, right?
Mont has been wandering around the house, whining in a high pitched voice, and his face all skewed up, asking me for this or that, then this again, or something else entirely. I have no patience because I've been getting 5 hours of interrupted sleep for at least 3 months again. I'm so TIRED of it!
Emmy is a sleeping champ until about 5:20, then if one wakes up, they both wake up for the rest of the morning. Without Mont's influence, she will wake up at about 6:20 on her own.
We have implemented early naps here the last while, starting at 10:30, I start gearing them up for naptime at 11. Mont will only sleep about 30-40 minutes, then wake up and whine and cry. Without naps, he sleeps only marginally better for the first 4 hours, from 7-10:30/11, then the rest of the night is still bad, waking up at 5:45/6. Later bedtimes harbor the same result.
I feel like screaming! :) I smile, because this is so ridiculous. I have no idea what to do with this kid!! My parents say I was a terrible sleeper until 3.5. Mont is one month past 3.5 years, and he is still outdoing my record.
HELP. Maybe you have the number for a night nurse? ha.
9 comments:
I read somewhere that whatever you do don't pray to be more patient unless you want more experiences to try your patience...pretty sure it was in conference one time.
Sorry he is not sleeping well! Have you tried limiting his amount of liquids in the evening so that he won't have to get up so much?
I am currently bribing Ava to sleep in her own bed all night. She usually makes a bed on the floor by our bed at about 2 in the morning, and then she grinds her teeth for the next 5 hours. I FEEL YOUR PAIN. In fact, I just told the kids they are own their own for a half hour while I veg. My brain is too tired to do anything else.
Good Luck, and know you are not alone!
Put him in pull-ups for nighttime. You may not want to revert to that, but if it means you get to sleep...I think it's worth it. And then once you notice his pull-ups are dry in the morning, you can go back to underwear at night. If he doesn't want to wear pull-ups at night, tell him straight up: "Mont, you can either wear pull-ups, or hold your pee until the morning. You choose." :) Aren't I nice? I don't do very well with interrupted sleep--I'm not nearly as patient when I'm tired. So I can totally understand where you are coming from, and in my mind this is a no-brainer: your sleep needs to become the priority.
And Jayci, give yourself a break! You're a great mom.
Hmmm...
I tell you these little ones keep us on our toes. On martawrites blog she talks about how everything is just a phase with these little ones--emphasizing that phases can be good or bad. Which I thought she put it brilliantly, so I try to remind myself of this. (Especially when my littlest has suddenly decided nursery isn't for him).
I'm curious to know if Mont is doing a lot of "business" during the day too? Or if it is just at night? If he is going an unusual amount it could possibly be a health issue. I would keep an eye on that especially where it started all of a sudden and especially where it is so many times in the night.
I hope you get some sleep. I know how much of a difference a good night's sleep makes for me. I really am so much nicer and more the mom I always thought I'd be.
oh my goodness! I needed this! haha i'm laughing hysterically at myself right now...My kids sleep great-ish, but I'm in a crazy boat right now as well. Chris is gone for about a month and since then Kai (who will be 5 in about a week) has done everything in his power to drive me to some sort of mental institution. SERIOUSLY.
I'll give ya some examples...
we have to go to the hospital 2-3 times a week for little Finn who is in speech therapy. Well, Thursday, Kai sneaked away because he wanted to go on an adventure. I had all hospital personnel looking for him.
Yesterday he said he wanted to go say hi to the neighbors. Instead of going to say hi, he sneaked into their backyard and accidentally fell into their iced over swimming pool. Luckily the neighbor got to him super fast before he drowned. He found some crayons and drew "treasure maps" all over my bathroom cabinets and rug. Had to throw the rug out....and this was just week one Chris was gone!
My whole body hurts and i feel like my head is going to fall off. I don't even one tiny bit take pleasure in your pain. I'm so sorry you are feeling like this too right now. All my kids went through stages of being bad sleepers to awesome sleepers. I know when they are young they don't know how to express themselves or are not even sure how they are feeling. Elena was my worst sleeper compared to all the kids. Now that she is nearly 7, she can now tell me it's because she has nightmares. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. I remember my brother having nightmares a lot and my mom had to take him to see a therapist...the therapist actually suggested that he get a dog. So my mom bought him a basset hound that slept with him so he could feel protected. Nightmares gone! worked like a charm...not sure this helps, but in short, it really could be a number of reasons why he's not sleeping. Time is the only way to tell. Not helpful I know. Just know that there is someone out there who is in just as much pain as you are right now... :)
p.s. i LOVE what your friend said about not praying for patience. LOL! That's where I've been making my mistake. For the past several weeks I've been BEGGING Heavenly Father to give me a tiny dose of his patience. No wonder things keep getting worse and worse...
p.s. if you ever find the answer, PLEASE let me know. I've tried being calm, but that only lasted a short time. I find myself screaming like a raging lunatic pretty much everyday and now Elena is starting to sound just like her mom when she gets angry. I know I need to change quick before this becomes a permanent thing. I just don't know how!
I don't know about older kids, but have you read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child? This man is the SLEEP GURU. He has pretty much dedicated his whole life to researching it and helping people and their kids sleep better. He has "Action Plans for Exhausted Parents...." good luck!!!!!
Try and think if anything significant happened when he started waking up again. Going in the toilet is a new adventure as well. So maybe he's enjoying this new experience... a little too much. Like someone else said, track it. He may be having a health issue. The only other thing I would ask, is how much attention is he getting during this time? Is this the only time he gets one-on-one time? Ella is tons better on the days she gets time while Jamo is in school. I wish I could help. My kids have been pretty good once I get them sleeping through the night. Good Luck!
I would start by limiting liquids two hours before bedtime too. And I would do pull ups at bedtime or tell him if he can wake up and go potty BY HIMSELF then he doesn't need them, but he cannot wake you up. I would lock my door for a few nights to establish a boundary and create a realization that mom is unavailable at night. Expecting a newly potty trained kid to hold it is unreasonable. Nightime wetting is not uncommon even until kids are seven because they physiologically don't have bladders that hold very much. So a pull up is perfectly acceptable, being independent is completely perfect. Leave the bathroom light on and tell him he can go by himself. If he doesn't flush and wash by himself then have him flush in the morning and wash in the morning. You do not need to be there for this. If he sleeps naked, so be it. He'll get cold and figure out that he should put his clothes back on. A 3 1/2 hear old can do that. Good Luck!
I am so, so sorry! I am no help, as Tucker STILL wets the bed & has to wear a diaper every night. I don't have any suggestions, but I just want to let you know I'm sympathizing with you. You'll be in my prayers!!
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