These are always long stories... and way more information than needed to be recorded, but if you're interested, read on.. if not, just ignore that I ever posted it!
(instagram!)
Napping in her basket
I have been laughing at all the questions and emails I've been getting about Emmy's arrival story. The most recent was an email from my friend Sarah who asked,
"
I read your blog & you said when you went to the hospital you where NINE cm. Where you panicing when you heard that or where you like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get her out or just waddling in & going I feel a little pressure? Talk about hello baby:)"
WELL. Here is how it all went down:
During pregnancy, I decided to forego re-reading Hypnobirthing, only because I was no longer afraid of child birth. I knew that I would know what labor felt like, and when I should go to the hospital because labor pains are, well, they're labor pains!
At my 38 week appointment, they asked if I wanted to be "checked" or not; why would I say "no" when I was just waiting in suspense to see if I was progressing? So I got checked, only to find out that I was not dilated
at all, and that the cervix wasn't even soft (what my primrose oil-taking should have done for me). This is the same doctor that ordered all sorts of tests and ultrasounds because he said I was measuring small. I wasn't panicked, but I was upset that I hadn't progressed at all! (this is funny to me later when I arrive at the hospital)
After all the tests that week, the radiologist and lab results confirm that the baby is just fine and measuring a normal weight and length.
Saturday during the afternoon session of General Conference, I began to notice that my Braxton Hicks contractions were regularly 10 minutes apart... I hoped they wouldn't stop.. and they didn't! They lasted an entire
33 HOURS.
It wasn't until Sunday night that I started to feel the dull pressure in my lower back that told me this could be it!
Monday morning around 1 o'clock, Mont woke up, and so did I. Mont woke up for his pacifier, and I woke up because of the labor pains!! It was starting!! I was sure of it.
Because the doctor told me I hadn't dilated at all, I keep thinking,
ugh... this is going to take me forever!
From the hours 2 to 4, I tried to sleep through the contractions, but with every one I'd wake up and just rock back and forth, again, trying not to wake up Mark. At 6:00 I decided I needed a shower if I was going to go into the hospital, so I attempted that.. All the while thinking, "
How do girls ever look ready and pretty before they go to the hospital?!" It was too much.. for Mark. I was determined to look decent, but he was determined too.
Probably didn't help my cause when I mentioned, "The contractions feel better if I kind of push. Is that weird?"
He said, "Don't dry your hair. We're going to the hospital right now."
I kept saying, "but they're going to make me go home!"
He called Labor & Delivery, and they said to come in too, so we left.
This was at 6:55.
After some skillful (and probably dangerous) weaving and "
My wife's in labor!" shouts to cut in to the base-gate line, we made it to the hospital at about 7:10; quite a feat for living where we do.
Mark wheeled me in to the hospital wear I tried to be silent through more contractions, not wanting to alarm those around me.
When the nurses showed me to my room, I looked up I think I heard angels singing as I saw the same midwife that delivered Mont (the reason I didn't tear with Mont). She is extremely talented at midwifery... her name (so I don't forget) is Colonel Yates. Oh I love that woman!
I told her my concerns at not being dilated at all, and having to be sent home.. She looked at me and said, "even if you're not dilated, I'll lie to you." "Thanks." was all I could get out after that.
When she checked me she said, "You're at an 8.5/9." I said, "WHAT?!" I was so HAPPY I wasn't going to be sent home.
Panic sort of spread through me when she followed that with, "A few more contractions and you'll be ready to push." The nurses and others began their organized rushing while hunting down the anesthesiologist and room prepping.
After I told them I wasn't dilated at all the previous week, they all wanted to know what doctor I had seen; I got a little smug thinking perhaps I had been dilated after all... he had been wrong about the baby measurements, so maybe he had been wrong about mine too! Probably not, but I held on to that.
The anesthesiologist arrived and was going to attempt an epidural, but realized it was too late, so he tried to hurry with a spinal.. I was already feeling like I had to push! When I told them that, they said, "Don't push! Stay still, breathe!"
After a few leg jumps (they expected me to hold still even though the Spinal's needle was pokin' those nerves! I know he was in a rush, but whoa.), my feet started to go warm and tingly. Sweet relief. I guess not many people get these anymore because they were all really impressed with me when I was still moving around and able to move my legs just fine.
My water was not breaking (again!), Emmy's head was too tight against it, creating a sort of seal so it couldn't (sorry if that doesn't make sense). The normal pokey thing wouldn't do it, so they had to attach something to her head (she still has the scrapes) so it could puncture. When it did, they noticed that the color was a little off, meaning Emmy had released some of that meconium around her, meaning she probably swallowed it, meaning they needed to clean her out before she breathed/coughed/cried.
Mark had gone out to make a couple quick phone calls when he knew I was pain-free, so ... like Mont's story, they had to rush out and find him when I was ready to push (about 5 minutes after I got comfortable).
So the pushing commenced. They put an oxygen mask on, for which I asked, "is this for me? or for her?" "For her, a little extra can't hurt." Sure. I found out why: the nurses made me mad when they would say "oh, she got mad at us for that one!" - Just say her heart rate is dropping!! She is not mad at me, her heart rate is dropping! Use your adult language, people! I'm not a 3 year old!
As we figured, the cord was wrapped tightly around her neck, so when they were able, they quietly cut the cord to loosen it from around her neck (Mark noticed they didn't tell me the cord was around her neck, probably to keep me calm). As soon as her head was through, and the cord was cut I noticed a shift in mood with the nurses. There was an urgency to get her completely freed. So they gently pressured me to rush with the pushes, pushing once or twice more per each contraction.
Then all the sudden she was out. They had the pediatrician there already because they knew in advance they'd need him. When the walked her over, the nurse told me quietly, "She's not crying because we don't want her to, this is good. We're meaning for this to happen. Everything is fine."
Poor Mark - no one told him!!! I had wondered why he looked so panicked! He kept asking, "Why isn't she crying?! Is this normal??" They were quick to tell him, but gosh! He could have used a forewarning.
After tubing her and sucking out all the fun stuff, she let out a gentle, not so strong cry, but a cry nonetheless. So we were on the right track! She scored very low on the apgar right then, but later she did loads better.
While they were doing all this, it was the time I was able to just look at her. That's all I could do, so I just took it all in. I saw a familiar profile, and saw lots of Mark's family in her. She was just perfect. And tiny! Holding her was just as new as it was when I was holding Mont for the first time.
Later in our post-partum room, Mark asked me what it was like to love a second child. I had been wanting to ask him too, but he had thought to ask first. I thought about it, and came up with this: When I had Mont, the mother's love I was feeling was so new and overwhelming, I cried at the simple thought of protecting him. I still have that love, it is already there, so now I just get to encircle this new little one into that love. It's just even more full. It's not new, it's magnified.
Day 10:
Note about what drugs were administered:
I had been really happy with how the epidural had gone with Mont, so much so that I was willing to do it again, without skepticism. Mont was completely alert, and I healed up nicely, all the while, turning what could have been a very long, painful, draining, unhappy day into the most relaxing, happy experience. SO. I was fine with what I could receive.
Having now had each, I would really recommend just the Spinal! The only thing with the Spinal is that it starts to wear off after an hour, and is gone after two.
