snow flakes

The snow just keeeeeeeps on falling. Buckwheat is about as happy about it as I am. So much for the shift in the universe I imagined a couple months back.. the days are certainly staying brighter longer, but the temperatures are still hovering around the low 20s to mid 30s. When I took this picture, the kids were running around in their mediocre snow gear (I will never learn how to dress for the cold), there was water pouring out of the rain gutters.. it's so weird! Cold enough for snow to stick, but warm enough for the ground to melt the lowest layer of ice. I can't figure this year's weather out. Maybe next week will be 70º. ha!

14/52: double vision

I'm sort of cheating on this week's portraits because only one of the following was taken in the 14th week of the year (the second one down). But since the camera arrived today, I will hopefully be putting a stop to these iphone pictures and picking up at a fresh starting line. Here's hoping. 

The two little ones watching a new/old movie together Monday morning:

On Emmy's birthday, while she wore/held all the presents she could, Mont pushed her around in the doll stroller making her look nothing shy of 90 years old. We were all laughing so hard, I'm grateful Emmy never got embarrassed (that has happened before, sweet girl!). She and Mont just kept going around and around. 

This morning [of the 10th], after I had gotten ready and opened the door, Mont and Emmy (now friends after the last 20 minutes of crying) poured into the bathroom with all their Easter eggs and new treasures. It was so cute watching Mont divvy out the treasures and eggs, watching Emmy just go along with whatever he was dreaming up. I am reminded looking at these pictures late at night what treasures my two little knuckleheads are; they really are so fun. I'm one lucky mom! : )

girls girls girls

My mom and sister and daughter (still feel like I'm getting used to being a mom, using that word!) all have April birthdays.. and as a fun little thing, we had the thought to celebrate by having a girls trip out to visit yours truly. I only now wish that I had made Tessa and my mom blow out candles as well! Mont would have loved helping. 

Here we are the first night all together at Little Bangkok in East Grand Forks for some Thai food.

At Pier 1 searching for some elusive bicycle book ends... AH! 

Finally just had to pre-buy them. (what? Online shopping??)

While browsing stores, Tessa and I fell in love with the same pair of pajamas, and in true sister fashion, my mom bought us each a matching pair. HA! We haven't matched in years and I am now realizing what all the fun is about. Awww, Tessie! 

Pretty sure I laugh my hardest when I'm around my mom and sister.. they are absolutely crazy sometimes and it's just the fun I love and miss. Maybe next year when I con them in to visiting again, it will be above freezing!! Maybe Dad will come plant some flowers! Mont would like to take care of some, too.. he even has a new rake and trowel at the ready. Maybe we'll bring them in our carry-on to Washington to visit (haaa).

turning two

Our sweet and sassy Emmy had her birthday on the 4th, making her an officially terrible two year old. Actually, she's still pretty dang sweet, and hopefully it's the sticky kind of sweet so it'll stay around forever. We sure love this little beam of sunshine and are so so grateful she's ours. Today I saw the sweetest thing.. I'm backlogging this, so this happened on the 10th of April: While playing with another little boy, Mont thought the boy was going to claim Emmy, so in a rush Mont ran up to Emmy, hugged her face tight to his chest, and said, "No. She's MY sister. Not yours." Emmy's smashed face and wide agreeing eyes was all I needed to see to know she was happy right where she was. She hugged him about as tight as he was hugging her. Nothing would have been able to pry them apart right then. I just wish they would be amicable like that all the day long! That might be my birthday wish. : )

Emmy eating her birthday pancakes; I figured she must be recounting all of the many experiences she's had in her two little years. This girl has been all over the place! 

Her shabby birthday cake. My friend (@ashtonscurr - bless you) said it looked pretty and whimsical. 

I'll take that over shabby! ha ha! At least it had "sparkles!"

Waiting for the song to hurry up so she could get to the cake!

I screenshot this during a video my sister Tessa took on her phone, so it's not all that clear... but I just can't get over her cheeks in her hands... She couldn't even contain her excitement! It looks like her elbows are resting, but they're not... she's just that happy about everything in this moment:

She blew her candles out like an expert! One.. then two! 

First pair of heels and already she's got her hand on her hip.

Happy birthday, my sweet little honey bee. 

13/52: bunnies

Sorry for friends who follow my instagram feed... the next several posts will probably have the same pictures you've already seen. We sold my actual camera, so while waiting for the next one the phone pics have had to compensate! (nothing too exciting on the camera front, just an updated version. But I'm plenty excited!)

Anyway, here are the two bunnies after they hunted for their eggs, but before they opened them (at least for Mont). When we got home from church, and after the kids' naps, we were getting ready to eat dinner, then afterwards have the egg hunt. Well as I was finishing up some dinner, Mont went upstairs to visit my mom who was visiting, and happened to look in her closet. AH! Having been sleepy from late-night stuffing, my mom simply laid the baskets of eggs down on the closet floor, just waiting for a wandering child. AH! My mom felt so bad, and my teasing probably didn't help, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world!! Mont was so excited to have "found the eggs" and wanted to show me SO badly. I quickly explained to him that the Easter Bunny still had to come hide the eggs for the hunt, and we shouldn't look at/in them until the hunt-game has been finished. Not sure how it went over, but he seemed happy with that lame explanation. So we had our friend Andrew ring the doorbell so we could make a big deal that "The Easter Bunny's here!!! Go wait in your room until he hides them for you!" Eh. At least Mont picked up the concept that Easter is about something more important. He loves to say, "Jesus came alive again!" I just clap my hands and say, "That's right, Mont!! You're so smart. Isn't that wonderful?!" He said it tonight (April 10th - I'm backlogging these posts, sorry) again and all the excitement and wonder was still all there. Happy Moments.. happy moments.

painted water

After painting, whatever it is that I paint, one of my most favorite things of the whole experience is seeing the color of the water when I'm done. The hues are often times milky and colored just my favorite muted shades. I leave the jar out for hours afterwards just to remind myself that I finished. Nothing big, but something pretty.

The morning after I finished this particular painting, I woke up to the severe morning light striking the mantle where the water was resting. Ah, I love morning light.. always inspires and awakens energy if I let myself soak it in the way I believe we're meant to.

... I painted again that day, too. : )

12/52: berries

I feel a little bad that Emmy's been the subject of the recent portraits, but she is just at that age! Everything she does has a flare. Ha! Even eating berries in her cereal.

11/52: color love

Just like Mont used to, Emmy [usually] chooses colors that work well together. I love watching her come up with the swirly shapes and ideas for what draw. See that yellow below her right hand? She pointed to the spot when it was still white, handed me a yellow and said, "Rabbit." I had her say please first, (ha!) then I set to work, outlining the shape of a rabbit for her. When I was done, she reached for the yellow and commenced coloring it in like crazy. Watching her is a huge enjoyment for me; her movements on paper so specific. When she has a pencil or pen in hand, she can do the tiniest little squiggles you've ever seen - loads of them. Like little swirly stars all over the paper done by my little color lover.

10/52: snow bunnies

red handed jill

Emmy is just as much a pirate as her brother! Here she is, having donned all but the belt, by herself.. I confess I helped set the eyepatch just a bit more securely. I never know what her mind will dream up for her little daily adventures. She ran around the house in this getup for as long as she could, saying all the pirate phrases Montoya had taught her. She wouldn't hold still for a better picture, so this is what we get!

nakin' boy

First off, thanks for all your suggestions in comments, texts, and messages. I really have a lot to think about and ideas to go off. I don't think it's a medical thing, as he can hold it for hours and hours during the day. After a day of running around, he is his most thirsty in the late afternoon hours and cries and screams for water when we withhold it, even if he has been drinking through the day (not even excessively. He just likes water.). Even on nights where he doesn't drink a whole lot, I think he wakes up mostly out of the desire to just be up and do something. I'm not quite sure. We think if he were a heavier sleeper, he would wind up wetting the bed. I guess I'm grateful he is getting himself to the toilet for that reason. We've moved a small bose radio into their room and have been playing some soft music as they fall asleep, and that has helped for the past three nights. Also, the last three nights have been more restful; but probably due to the fact that he hardly slept at all last week! We shall see what comes of this.

I don't know if I could put him back in pull-ups/diapers.. he's accomplished this huge thing, and I don't want to take that away from him as a source of confidence, turning it into a failure (I know someone who this happened to, and the kid never bounced back quite the same..). So probably, I'll just have to stick it out, and outlast him. And go to bed earlier myself (10 or earlier). Something I've never liked doing..

On to the original reason for this post: My nakin' boy. He has a lot of different names for himself, this Mont boy of mine. But when he's naked, he becomes, "Naked Boy" of course. When it's morning time and he demands bacon for the reason that he is, "Bacon Boy!" Then there is also the time where he is really enjoying his cookie, and he calls himself the "Cookie Boy!" (this stems from his Uncle Michael who was dubbed The Cookie Boy out of his sheer adoration for the food). Not the most original of names, but he still loves these designated titles. Similar to Superman or Batman, I assume.

This particular occasion, my nakin' boy ran off to hide after using the bathroom (he strips down completely still whenever possible). Lovely.. I could not find him anywhere, and I couldn't even hear him giggling! Which is normally how I trace him through the house.

Fiiiinally I found him, in a place I had already glanced over. But even then I had to take a second look. When I reassured myself that I had in fact spotted his face, I made him hold still! don't move! while I ran to get the camera because I could not believe how stealthily he had been hiding. This is one for the record books for my funny little three year old. He's quickly becoming our hide and seek master!

sleep rewind

Today is one of those days, and I am going to take this therapeutic moment right now and write it out, then hopefully hit publish so I can possibly get some feedback or ideas if I'm not too embarrassed.

On this overcast Friday, we all have the hint of dark blue on the inner corners of our eyes, accompanied by blank stares. We are all exhausted from lack of sleep.

Thanks to Mont.

When I sleep trained him back in October, he started sleeping solidly through the night. We were all so thrilled. Next up was toilet training. He succeeded at that too. And since November has been successfully toilet trained.

However.

Sleep has gone out the window since then. I've been in denial to the degree of not admitting it here. He wakes up at least 4/5 times a night just to go to the bathroom, stripping down to his birthday suit, then needing us to help him put his pajamas on again, or remind him to flush the toilet and wash his hands. We would tell him to hold it, except each time he goes like a racehorse.

I've lost my temper more than I'd care to admit today, and have even tried putting myself in timeout, which still sent Mont into a tail spin of tears, leaving me wanting to bang my head into my headboard over and over again. ha! Seriously.

Lds.org has been visited as I read through a few talks on anger, feeling bad that I'm not more patient. I found one quote that I had to write down for my fridge:

"Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry; for anger resteth in the bosom of fools." (Ecclesiastes 7:9) Nice, right?

Mont has been wandering around the house, whining in a high pitched voice, and his face all skewed up, asking me for this or that, then this again, or something else entirely. I have no patience because I've been getting 5 hours of interrupted sleep for at least 3 months again. I'm so TIRED of it!

Emmy is a sleeping champ until about 5:20, then if one wakes up, they both wake up for the rest of the morning. Without Mont's influence, she will wake up at about 6:20 on her own.

We have implemented early naps here the last while, starting at 10:30, I start gearing them up for naptime at 11. Mont will only sleep about 30-40 minutes, then wake up and whine and cry. Without naps, he sleeps only marginally better for the first 4 hours, from 7-10:30/11, then the rest of the night is still bad, waking up at 5:45/6. Later bedtimes harbor the same result.

I feel like screaming! :) I smile, because this is so ridiculous. I have no idea what to do with this kid!! My parents say I was a terrible sleeper until 3.5. Mont is one month past 3.5 years, and he is still outdoing my record.

HELP. Maybe you have the number for a night nurse? ha.

9/52: siesta

Wednesday was bed and bath laundry day over here, and with the affects of a 5 am wake up for all of us, we found ourselves looking for excuses to relax in softly lit spaces all day long. Mont was upstairs I believe, playing with dinosaurs, while Emmy and I snuck downstairs to sprawl out on a bare bed. I surrendered all the pillows so I could soak in every last minute of calm from her I could while I read a book. I believe this only lasted a few minutes, but it felt luxurious.

winter willow

There has been a shift in the seasons here. I can very minutely feel Winter start to loosen its hold when I stand outside on the iciest winter mornings, as the season starts to give in, ever so slightly. It's as though when Winter becomes her strongest, her willpower for ice and cold starts weakening, giving in as she readies herself for the warm embrace of Spring.

Our bodies are becoming more energized inside houses, as the morning sun pours through our Eastern facing windows. It's almost torture as we try to remain still and calm inside, not wanting to spin through our day's allotment of entertainments all in one rush. The kids and I are finding a lot to do.. puzzles, magnets, stickers, books, paints, crayons, scissors, threads, cleaning, vacuuming, dusting, laundry, dishes, cooking, eating, snacking, changing, brushing hair, brushing teeth, chasing, dinosaurs, animals, puppets, race tracks, cars, train tracks, towers, mess making, organizing, songs, dancing, writing, jumping, pirating, doll houses, movies, tv shows, electronics, memory games. The list might be longer if I gave it more thought. Every little task seems to take an important spot in our schedule as we draw out our time, spacing our minutes, allotting slots for play and slots for seriousness and time outs. There is a lot to do if you pace yourself.

We are tired of pacing ourselves. We need the freedom of green in the summertime. Of adirondack chairs with fluffy pillows and the buzz of bees drawing themselves up into the pollen filled flowers of a garden. We are craving the warm yellow that can currently only be found in the color of that cute house surrounded by snow in the picture above. For now, we feel like the willow; shrouded in ice from the previous night's fog, bending and swaying slowly as possible to not dust ourselves off too quickly, for fear of exposing our excitement of Summer too soon. Spring is getting nearer. Just a few more weeks and the snow will be turning into giant puddles, begging for the ripples that accompany little bright yellow boots.

our wonka anecdotes

online

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory has been a favorite for a while now in our home; we must have introduced it to Mont sometime last summer. Ever since, we've slowly been coming up with an arsenal of 'anecdotes' to childhood problems and concerns. Not that we are even close to experts, but for Mont, it seems to work a little bit, often enough; it works well enough that we keep using them. Let me tell you our theory about this classic film.

Every child character has a vice that is most often found in childhood. Every child meets their fate in some unfortunate way because they were selfish or disobedient to the council given to them by either their parent or their guide, Mr. Wonka. I haven't read the book it's based on yet, and as I'm writing this, I'm sure I better read it soon in order to find what more is available from the mind of Roald Dahl - not sure what's taken me so long! Perhaps I can get the audio for my new Discman. Yes!

Here's the list of children and what we like to tell little Montoya when he's not being his nicest:

Veruca Salt: This despicable girl says, "I want" about 4,000 times throughout this movie, give or take a couple. Mont calls her "the bad egg," which is ever so appropriate. Whenever Mont demands something with the phrase, "I want, I want" we say, "Oh, Veruca! No thank you. Please don't say, 'I want.' Please ask nicely. Say, 'Mama, may I please have...?' Then he does. If he doesn't, then we bring up The Garbage Shoot: because Veruca was such a bad egg and used the terrible phrase, "I want," she went down the garbage shoot. This will calm Mont down quite quickly. His eyes get big and he says, "I don't want to go down the garbage shoot. I want to be a nice boy, like Charlie." Even when times call for the "want" word, we will still try to have him use the words, "I would like... ." For example, when Santa asks, "What do you want for Christmas, little boy?" We tell him he should answer with the "I would like..." phrase. Gosh, reading this later we sound so strict.

Violet Beauregarde: This little smarty pants is a nose picker and a constant gum chewer (the gum chewing really isn't a problem for little Mont, though he does enjoy his occasional peppermint chewing stick).

*Just for fun, 5 hours after starting this post, I googled Willy Wonka's Children's dot dot dot and the 7 Deadly Sins came up. That answers a whole lot. I better read the book, but just for fun I will continue with my post, regardless! After I'm all done jotting this down I will go through that idea and see which deadly sins were assigned to each child. Pretty funny.

Back to Violet: Every time Mont's little nose starts to bother him enough that he feels he cannot wait for a piece of bathroom paper to fix it, we tell him, "Mont! Don't turn into a blueberry!! If you pick your nose you might turn into a blueberry!" To which he responds, "No! No blueberries!" ha ha

Mike Teevee: well... too much tv! He might get sucked in, turned into a million pieces and never be put back together again!

Augustas Gloop: glutony - Mont looooves his "cocoa" (Carnation Instant Breakfast Mixes + Milk). He asks for it literally morning, noon and night. But if he drinks too much he might get sucked into a cocoa river and pulled up into a tube and get stuck! Oh my.

Thankfully One: we haven't had to use the last two anecdotes.. yet. I'm sure there will come a day, probably tomorrow.

Thankfully Two: Mont really likes Charlie and how nice he is. We love to point out how hard Charlie works for money, and how he loves candy more than everyone else because he worked so hard to get it. When he gets the ticket, he is SO happy and SO surprised! He loves his mother and grandparents, and is always kind and sweet. When Mont is nice, he loves to hear that he is nice like Charlie (or Dino Dan, but that's unrelated!). Because Charlie isn't vindictive or prideful in the end, he gives back his candy, and wins the Wonka Game.

Oh this movie has so many lessons to be learned.. I am so looking forward to the book and one day reading the book to Mont. Having a boy like Mont is such a fun little adventure. His imagination is always turning and spinning. Now if only we could get him to focus in on lessons and singing time in Primary instead of his mom sitting behind the piano!

paperman

My friend Aubrey posted this on her blog on Valentine's Day, and I just had the chance to watch it. Before the month springs forward into another, I thought I'd better post it quickly to remember the coincidences that allow for love to happen, just so. Darling little film.

8/52: Sunbeam

Today was the first Sunday this boy has asked to wear a tie to church! So here he is with both a tie and a smile to match his handsome daddy's. This morning when I laid eyes on him wearing his new tie, my heart just turned to absolute mush. All through primary, too; I'd look up at him and we'd wave back and forth with our hands under our chins then give each other a thumbs up. What a little ray of sunshine for me. 

ever in my favor

via

Oh say whatever you want to say about me being years late to this craze.. but I'm reading them. And loving them. The first one I listened to via audiobook on itunes was when I had my eye surgery (still haven't posted on that.. not sure you want me to!). I loved the "reading talent" of Carolyn McCormick, and looking her up just now, she is just how I pictured she would be. The second book I read the old fashioned way, but found myself hearing the voice of Ms. Carolyn reading the words, so I decided I'd better just call ahead and request for the audiobook to be sent to the library for the third book in the trilogy. That's where I am now: Disc 1, Track 3.

This is where this post is now changing gears.. The real reason for this post has very little to do with any book series. Gotcha.

I have always been a fan of audiobooks, but they are so dang darn pricey! $25 for the first Hunger Games audiobook.. unabridged, but still. That was a bit of a stinging-dollar-bullet for me to bite, since I rarely read/listen to a book more than once. But because of the eye surgery and needing to listen to something completely captivating, I gave in and justified the purchase as a 'necessary entertainment.' ha! There had to be an easier, cheaper way..

The library! That is where I checked out the third book's audio recording, read by the great Ms. Carolyn. Ding ding ding!! Free for checkout to boot.

Uploading the discs on to my laptop, to then transfer to my phone for easy listening anywhere and anytime, I thought would be a simple enough process, if not time consuming.

Time consuming was right! My laptop is now aged and vintage, but not like a fine wine. The kids have unwittingly knocked it off the coffee table, tripped over it (I'm getting much better and making sure it's completely under the couch when not in use nowadays), dropped objects onto it (thankfully never liquid), etc. It has seen better days, but still is holding out strong for the most part. It is now a 6 year old macbook pro, and is mostly working like a champ. The only thing is that the cd drive is no longer 100% reliable; if the disc has any scratches, small or otherwise, it will struggle with reading them.

This is getting too long!!

Long story short... after hours of searching for different options of how to get that dang audio book on my dang phone, (even my phone won't hook up to my computer since it missed a major software update - what? Thanks a lot apple. Same goes for an external CD drive.) I decided to ditch the new technologies of our current day and jump back a couple decades.

I ordered a Discman. Whoa... watch out. Did I just turn 85 or 27 last November?

Really, though. Think of all the things I can be doing while listening to a book instead of on a couch with my eyes glued to a book and my fingers clutching at it. Waiting to find some scrap of an answer to any mystery that might have befallen the heroines! Dramatic, yes, but imagine doing all of this while sewing or painting, or exercising! The possibilities are nearly endless... no Pinterest while listening, however; that is too distracting as it all too attention grabbing. But most everything else - folding laundry! See? The list goes on.

Anyone else out there in the same funny boat as myself? Probably not. But if there is, and by some shred of bad luck you find yourself in my stupidly-stressful dilemma, just know I'm putting all of my pennies on the walkman's odds being ever in its own favor. ha - Happy Hunger Games! Until the batteries give out.

heavy heart

"Living the Gospel does not mean that the storms of life will pass us by, but we will be better prepared to face them with serenity and peace." -Joseph B. Wirthlin 

Social media has really shrunken my social world; when friends go through things, I feel it more deeply and more quickly than I would have hearing news through the grapevines of word-of-mouth. A couple different friends have lost some dear little loved ones the last two weeks, and my heart just aches for them. 

Inadvertently I squeeze my two little ones tighter, and smile a little longer as I listen to them and their frequent babblings. They've been getting away with a little more, and I'm not quite sure that I mind for now. For the moment, I have been reminded once again to enjoy everything completely. I remember hearing other friends who were moms long before I was, talk about their greatest fears being that something would happen to their little children, or their husband. I couldn't understand the depth of that fear until I had my own. I try not to let fear overpower my mind as I think of what could happen since I know that fear is the opposite of faith. I'm not sure how I would handle losing a little one, but in my moments of pondering and deep thinking, I am reassured by my knowledge of the resurrection. How grateful I am that we will be reunited with our loved ones again; young and old alike. The above quote is one I read yesterday, and it has since stayed close to my thoughts, as a constant reminder that we don't know what experiences are around the corner. All we can do is prepare and make our testimonies as strong as we can, to ensure that we are able to stand against the storms that will surely come to us in this life. At times this life can seem just too hard, and at those times, I hope everyone can feel the love of our Savior, and the love that is present in the plan of Salvation. Without His love, there would be nothing to hope for. With it, we have everything to hope for. 

7/52: Noah

from Katherine's Instagram

"Living the Gospel does not mean that the storms of life will pass us by, but we will be better prepared to face them with serenity and peace." -Joseph B. Wirthlin 

Sweet Noah passed away in his sleep on the night of the 10th, and this picture was taken that same day. I'm sure this will be a treasured picture for the rest of forever as they wait to be reunited with their littlest boy. My heart has been breaking so often the last week and a half as I think of our friends. There will never be words strong enough to emphasize our love for them, so we just pray. Gratefully, prayer is a wonderful thing. 

history: Katherine and Daniel are friends of ours from Alaska, and she is sisters with Aimee, our sister-in-law.